"what you give is what you get in return..."

it's been a long time i haven't updated my blog... it's all because i've been very busy since my friend's Dad passed away... For those who have read about the Friend A, B & C, that friend of mine is Friend A. She is really depressed right now and... Something unexpected had happened... In a way, I think it's meant to happen... Here's the story...

Friend A's Dad passed away a week ago and the wake of her father lasted for a week and two days... Just this Monday, unexpectedly, Friend B came to the wake... The initial reaction of Friend A, is that, she got mad... Why? Because she does not want Friend B to be there and if Friend B is planning to apologize to Friend A, it's just not the right time... Friend A was hurt so much that she would not want to accept an apology just like that... Friend B caused so much damage... So, what happened next, when Friend B was about to leave, Friend A snapped and in a higher pitch said: "I do not need you here! For a long time I did not utter any word when I am hearing negative things that you have said at my back... You should even be thankful that I NEVER have degraded nor said foul words towards you." And, to some extent, Friend A even pointed a finger at Friend B's face and then, Friend B's brother accompied her out of the house...

Next thing happened, when Friend A came home, Friend B managed to blog about her encounter with Friend A last November which contained some lies to the story... I would really like to give the link here but her entry is in Filipino.... To make the long story short, she even got mad about what Friend A have done to her... To think that she started everything and now that she got a taste of her own medicine, that's how she reacted... And so, the brother of Friend B even told Friend A that her sister is traumatized about what happened... Well, if you can only understand Filipino and will be able to read what Friend B has on her blog, you will NEVER get the hint that she's in a trauma...

Of course, Friend B's brother defended her... told that Friend A was wrong in making a scene and that, Friend A DESERVES to be humiliated and degraded by their mom and aunt... Friend A defended herself by telling Friend B's brother "Who are they to judge me like that?". In my opinion, everyone does not have ANY RIGHT to treat someone shitty just because she/he desrves it... Even God does not know how to punish people... As to Friend A's point of view, she just could not take it anymore that's why she bursted all of a sudden and unexpectedly made a scene... In a way, she's defending her side... Specially right now that she had lost her father, she's in a LOT of pain...

you just got to work for it...

In life, when you really want something important to you you really have to work for it... and sometimes it would even take blood, sweat and tears just to get whatever you want...

Just when I WAS so happy about getting married and all, suddenly there's this problem that would come to test your patience and determination on something... here's the situation:

My beloved's brother is also getting married this month and, we were suggesting to have a double wedding... The girl's parents did not agree and I was told by my beloved, that her parents will really get mad if they would find out that me and my beloved will get married on the same year. JUST BECAUSE OF THE DAMN SUPERSTITION THEY BELIEVE IN, WE HAVE TO MAKE OUR WEDDING A SECRET!!! I am in rage and so much HURT by that fact.... The fact that I CANNOT tell our friends about it... I CANNOT tell to my Beloved's siblings... I CANNOT share it to some significant people whom I want to share with... I CANNOT even wear my wedding ring... WE CANNOT even celebrate the wedding... My Mom is going back to New Jersey on the 17th and we do not know when will she be able to go back here in the Philippines... Anyone out there feels how I feel right now??? It's so painful... To think this happens only ONCE IN A LIFETIME and here's the f***** situation we're into... To think that we are even matured enough this is what we have to face...

But if there's no other choice, I guess I have to face it after all and God knows what's next... As for me, one thing is for sure... I WILL CRY BECAUSE OF SADNESS ON THE DAY OF MY WEDDING... actually, I am also crying right now because this is really painful for me... someone out there, please say something or suggest something that me and my beloved can do...

disappointed...

Everything got cold all of a sudden than made me ask something that I wrote it in my e-mail for him... Then he told me his reason (or I think it's an alibi) that he's too busy to go online... Even if I told him that what I e-mailed him is something really important... I continued to text him until I stopped since he's not replying to any of my text messages... Not until I texted him about my family problem so he replied... then he texted just hours ago, asking how are things going... Then, he got sarcastic with my reply that he does not have time to date... And that's when I told him, "Enough said... Thanks for everything and I'll never text you again... Sorry for texting you, I realized I was just bothering you." And things ended there... He did not replied to that...

What I am feeling right now, is that I am mad, sad and disappointed.... Mad because he got so sarcastic... Which I least expected or maybe it's all because I just don't know him much since it has been years we haven't seen each other... Sad because I would not want to end this way... NEVER... He really is a special friend that I have because even if we lost contact from time to time, his concern is always genuine... Disappointed because I never have thought he would do something like that... He assured me of so many things... Yet, after those things, here we are... like enemies... To think that Christmas is fast approaching... I feel so sad that his heart got cold towards me that our friendship has no room anymore in his heart... it's so sad...

there's a storm...

As of today, classes are suspended in all grade levels... It's so sad that we are experiencing a major calamity right now, here in the Philippines. Days ago, there was a storm and now many people are homeless, lots of flash floods in the provinces and in some parts of the city, some people have died already of drowning and there are also those who are still missing... Now, there's another strom that is much stronger and bigger... Big enough to cover our country... here's a picture of the storm...

As of now, it is not raining hard and it's not windy also to where I am at but... I still do worry about those people who are in the provinces... Please do pray that we'll get through this...